Merlin and Arthur - Lies for Love
by ChasingADestiny
Summary: (ER) - Will the young Warlock finally reveal his true self, would the young prince be forgiving, and will their feelings and lives remain intact as they face the Knights of Medere and the treacherous challenges that their destiny has chosen for them?
1. Royal Duties

Title: **Lies for Love**

Pairing: Merlin&Arthur

POV: Shared throughout the chapters

Rating: T

AN: I started writing this a long time ago, long before Arthur was king or Uther had died.

Fic is based slightly around 'The Fires of Idirsholas' from Series 2 episode 12.

Starts off a little slow especially this chapter, (first fic I'd ever wrote) but soon gets going as the plot opens up, so stick with it ;)

Will be around 9ish chapters, majority of which have been written already.

Reviews would be lovely and I hope you enjoy :D

Jess. X

Summary: Merlin and Arthur have been a couple for quite a while now, though something hasn't been right between them recently. Merlin has been acting off with Arthur as the guilt of the secret he holds close to his chest has started to take its toll on the manservant.

Will the young Warlock finally reveal his true self, would the young prince be forgiving, and will their feelings and lives remain intact as they face the Knights of Medere and the treacherous challenges that their destiny has chosen for them?

* * *

Chapter 1: Royal Duties

It was a cold dull morning in Camelot with only the slightest spread of sun which managed to shine annoyingly through the gap in Arthur's rich silk curtains, waking him slightly. This particular morning was even more frustrating for the young Prince than usual as he was awoken further by a loud knocking on his chamber door.

"Enter" Arthur spoke half asleep, an ill amused tone to his voice as he lay slumped into his soft bed, unwilling to wake from his slumber.

"The King wishes to speak with you, sire. It's a matter of great urgency."

The messenger was clearly anxious and on edge after being given the task of delivering news of such importance to the future King of Camelot.

Recognising the boy's unease, Arthur simply thanked and dismissed him, which seemed to make the boy relax a little as he bowed his head and left his Prince's chambers.

* * *

Arthur entered the great hall in a huff. He secretly wanted to go back to bed and just forget about whatever problems his father was about to present him with, but he would never do that. Arthur was loyal; the type of man that would lay down his own life to protect the people he cared for. He had proven that on so many occasions and this one was no different, whatever his father was to ask of him he would do it, if not to gain the Kings respect, but for his people, his kingdom, and most importantly to prove himself worthy of one day wearing the crown.

Arthur eventually looked up to see his father looking unnervingly worried. It was at that moment he realised all eyes were on him and he suddenly felt cold and lonely. He quickly scanned the room trying to spot his manservant but it was no good. Merlin was strangely nowhere to be seen, making Arthur feel even more insecure - if that were even possible.

Forcing Merlin's disappearance to the back of his mind Arthur took a deep breath and approached his father.

"Sire, what's going on?"

The King stepped towards his fragile son and placed a supportive yet stern hand upon his young shoulder.

"Arthur, I need you to take a few men and ride out to the citadel immediately"

Arthur seemed unsure and his forehead creased in confusion. "Why?"

"Smoke has been seen rising from inside its walls. You know what this means?" The King asked uncharacteristically tense.

"The fire of Idirsholas?" He questioned.

With the wrinkles running deep along his head, Uther cringed at the mention of this and he simply nodded.

At this point the Prince was confused. "But... I don't understand. No one has step foot over that threshold in 300 years, how can this be possible?"

Gaius, the courts physician and trusted ally of King Uther, saw his opportunity to butt in and quickly make it clear to Arthur that the situation was serious and needed to be investigated.

"Sire" Gaius began. "The legends say that when the fires of Idirsholas burn, the Knights of Medere will ride again"

Arthur didn't look very impressed.

Although his father had brought him up to believe that all sorcerers were the same and that magic was evil and not to be trusted, he never seemed to be scared of it. Arthur had seen so many sorcerers executed by Uther's hand that he feared his father more than any form of magic.

"Father, surely you don't believe in this...legend. It's just a load of superstitious nonsense" He unknowingly mocked the King, a slight cockiness in his tone.

"Arthur, if this legend turns out to be true I want to know I did everything in my power to stop it from progressing"

"I understand" He lied. "I'll prepare to ride out immediately and send word to Camelot as soon as I reach the citadel."


	2. Missing

Chapter 2: Missing

"Where is he?" The Prince thought to himself as he paced up and down the length of his chambers, clumsily shoving objects into a bag that would be needed for his upcoming adventure. He knew it was wrong to be thinking about Merlin when his father was so worried about the safety of the kingdom, but he couldn't help it.

Merlin was the most important thing to him. The two of them had been through so much together in the past, and after Gwen had left with Lancelot all those years ago Merlin had been the one who had picked Arthur back up again.

He was the one who had fixed him, who had made him the man he was today.

Of course if the King was ever to find out that his son, the future King, was not only in love with a servant, a commoner nonetheless, but a _man_. He would probably have the pair of them executed without even the slightest of hesitation. The pure shame it would bring upon Camelot and its people. Not to mention the fact that Arthur would produce no heir to the throne once the King himself had passed on.

It was unthinkable, in fact the very thought of his love for Merlin being public knowledge made Arthur feel week at the knees, forcing him to sit down.

As the Prince sat on his throne like chair fidgeting, trying to get comfortable, he remembered how oddly Merlin had acted the night before.

He had dismissed him from his duties and asked the young manservant to spend the night with him in his warm chambers, instead of in his own which were dark and lonely.

Arthur hated the fact that Merlin had such little luxuries in Camelot. He would sometimes lie in bed at night and think about how cold and alone Merlin must feel in his neglected room - once used as a place for Gaius to store his potions and books before Merlin had arrived all those years ago.

One night Arthur had actually managed sneak past a sleeping Gaius and climb into Merlin's small, rigid bed. He knew that if anyone was to catch him there they'd have both been in serious trouble, but he just couldn't resist it. The adrenaline, the excitement, the dangerousness of the situation, and above all the sheer fact that he just wanted to comfort Merlin, to hold his fragile pale frame in his stable and masculine arms. And he knew that it would be extremely unlikely that the King, or any man of noble standing would come to the Physicians chambers in the middle of the night anyway.

Arthur had always felt like he had to protect Merlin, keep him safe from the world. Probably because of how timid and perfectly useless Merlin was with a sword, and therefore incapable of defending himself, but also because if anything was to happen to him Arthur would never be able forgive himself, he'd feel pain unlike any other.

Unfortunately however, danger was often a theme in both boys' lives. They both knew how likely it was that one of them would be left alone in the world without the other. And even though it was too painful for them to talk about, they often took every little opportunity they had to be with each other. So last night when Merlin had turned down the offer of spending the evening with his beloved Prince, there was clearly something bothering him and quite rightly, Arthur was worried.

He'd decided to go and look for Merlin himself rather than wait for him to show up. So without further hesitation or even bothering to eat his breakfast that a stand-in-servant had kindly laid out for him whilst he'd been deep in thought, Arthur almost like a dog that had caught sent of something in the air, jumped to his feet and hastily left for Merlin's chambers.

* * *

Running his fingers through the thick mop of soft blonde hair that was currently standing on end at the top of his head, Arthur made a quick attempt at trying to appear normal. He smoothed a hand over his crumpled tunic and took a good few moments trying to regain his breath – not that he had been running of course – When his fist unknowingly knocked on the wooden door that separated him from what he hoped was Merlin on the other side.

Again Arthur's body was taking action and ruling his head once more as he barged into Gaius's chambers unannounced.

"Sire" Gaius squinted, clearly a little shaken by the sudden presence in his once empty room.

"Ah, Gaius, I don't suppose Merlin is in there?" Arthur said, gesturing towards a little door at the far end of the room, his eyes beady and darting all over the physicians's work place.

Gaius shifted uncomfortably on the spot, almost as if he had just been caught red handed doing something terrible.

Not that Arthur had noticed, he'd walked straight into the room and hadn't stopped until he'd reached the wooden door that he hoped divided him from his missing servant. His eyes narrowed, his hands reached out and his stomach flipped, the idea of seeing his manserverant clearly making an impression on the young Prince.

"Merlin?" He didn't knock nor did he wait for Gaius's reply. Barging into the back room, heart full of hope, his eyes told their own story and by the looks of the smile that had now taken up vacancy on Arthur's face, he'd found what he had been looking for.

Merlin.


	3. Let's Pretend

Chapter 3: Let's Pretend

Merlin had arrived at his own chambers the night he had declined the Prince's bed and found he couldn't sleep.

He just laid there, his thoughts clouded and his stomach performing summersaults. Everything had been perfect for too long now and he couldn't face the truth that he knew one day would have to come, but neither could he carry on lying to Arthur.

He had helped to build the Prince's trust back up again after he had been betrayed by so many people in the past, when all along Merlin himself had been lying to him, and the guilt had eaten away at the boy for far too long.

Arthur hadn't noticed, Merlin would never allow that to happen, but he had weakened in both body and soul.

His heart ached, wanting nothing more than for the Prince to know the whole truth, and for him to accept it.

His posture changed, he no longer walked tall and proud, instead he curled into himself. Head hung low as if hiding from the world, and his shoulders slumped as if he had an invisible force pushing him down.

His presence darkened, people no longer smiled when Merlin walked past, now they pitied him.

His head hurt, it was filled with thoughts, so many thoughts of concerns, questions, dreams, needs, hopes, doubts...spells!

Merlin was a Warlock.

A sorcerer.

A magical being.

A dead man walking if the King had his say, and it was killing him.

Merlin had always accepted that he was a Warlock, and a powerful one at that. He was born that way and at first it was easy. Arthur was just a friend, all-be-it his best friend, but his feelings hadn't ran deeper than that of friendship.

He would use his magic in secret to protect the future King in the hope that one day said King would unite the land of Albion once more and bring sorcery back to Camelot.

But things had certainly changed within those few years and it was no longer easy to hide who he truly was. Merlin had realised the true nature of his feelings and Arthur was no longer merely a friend, a Prince.

No. He was much more.

Arthur was his lover, his life, his everything. And all of the lies and the pretence hurt Merlin more than he dared to explain.

So when Arthur had asked the Warlock to spend the night with him in his warm bed that seemed so inviting at the time, he just couldn't. He already felt as though he was betraying Arthur and to have slept with him, pretending all was fine would have only made the manservant feel guiltier.

But now he was stood in front of him.

Only moments ago Arthur had barged through his door – not for the first time – and Merlin was shocked. He had tried so hard to avoid his Prince, avoid those hypnotising whirlpools of emotion that often caught him off guard.

He hated what Arthur could do to him.

His smile made him weak at the knees, his pout even more so and Arthur knew it. His lover would often play on the fact that he could make Merlin do whatever he wanted, hell he'd even made him beg for it on more than one occasion, but this time it was different- it had to be.

He couldn't use Arthur for his own pleasure, not now.

Not ever again. He had decided that a long time ago.

But he was still scared, he didn't want Arthur to see the man he had become, a shadow of his former self, a body with no ghost.

No he just couldn't- he wouldn't allow that.

So Merlin did what he does best and acted as though everything was fine. His smile took its usual form, big and bright lighting up the Prince's features as he forced the pearly grin wider, his eyes intense yet loving, desperately trying to hide secrets deep within them. And he stood tall, not too tall, but tall enough to fool the Prince.

Well, that is at least what the Warlock had thought he was doing...

* * *

Merlin looked different, but Arthur didn't know why. Scanning the boy he tried to work it out, silently noting everything his brain would allow.

His cloths were the same.

He still wore those ridiculously baggy breeches accompanied by an equally baggy tunic, all of which supported with a belt that wrapped tightly around his hips adding shape to his skinny frame.

His neck hidden by the scarf that hung loosely as it always did, - usually hiding the love marks that Arthur had put there in a moment of pure lust for the boy - his hair thick, black and neat almost as if it had been sculptured for the Prince's pleasure. And his skin, pale, endearing, almost mesmerising.

Merlin's grin was plastered over his equally stunning face as it always was when Arthur was around. And his inviting eyes were deep blue and wide, filled with so much love for the man stood in front of him, but there was something else clouding the boys vision, something Arthur couldn't put his finger on.

He had noticed the change in Merlin no matter how much his servant had tried to hide it.

But, now it was Arthur's turn to act as though everything was fine between them.

* * *

"Sire" Merlin was the first to break the silence in which both boy's had been furtively studying one another.

"Thank god, I thought you had forgotten how to speak as well as how to do your job" Arthur mocked. There was no anger to his tone though, only that of slight relief to finally see the boy again. His heart rate slowly returning to its regular beat.

Merlin hung his head in shame; another thing that had changed in the Warlock, he no longer always bit back at the Prince's torts. What right did he have? Arthur was right to say the things he did. "Sorry Sire, I know I should I have been there for you this morning. Wh-What did your father want?"

Arthur had to stop himself from rolling his eyes, he would never admit it but he always enjoyed Merlin's surly retorts, and to not have the boy bite back at his obvious attempts at winding him up made something twinge in his heart. "He wants me to go on this ridiculous trip to the citadel" he sighed. "It's a waste of time if you ask me."

Merlin's ears suddenly pricked up at the mention of the citadel. He had heard Gaius speak about its history before. How apparently, 300 years ago seven of Camelot's finest Knights had been seduced by a sorcerers call. And how one by one they succumbed to her power and at her command they became a terrifying and brutal force that rode through the lands leaving death and destruction in their wake.

It was only after the sorceress herself was killed that the Knights of Medere finally grew still. And if the fires burnt again Merlin feared for their lives. "Why, what does he want you to ride out there for?" Merlin sounded a little more anxious than he had intended.

"Well, you see Merlin if you had bothered to turn up this morning you would know why." He did roll his eyes this time.

"Arthur" Merlin sounded serious; he wasn't in the mood for jokes. He knew how dangerous the citadel was and he wanted to know what the sudden rush to be there was.

The Prince sighed almost in defeat as if he had accepted Merlin wasn't going to argue back. "Someone saw smoke rising from its walls this morning" Arthur demonstrated with his hands that of flames. "Frankly I find the whole thing ridiculous; I'm only going to make my father feel better."

Merlin's eyes widened as if the news had just frozen him on the spot, it was clear the boy was scared. "Arthur, this is serious. Camelot could be in danger. _You _could be in danger."

The Prince was now aware of Merlin's unease and the stern tone in his voice made him buckle inside. "Merlin" he said in a childish voice, stepping closer towards his servant for the first time since he had entered the room. "Have I ever told you how much of a girl you are?"

At this point Merlin couldn't refuse, the comeback was at the tip of his tongue and he was afraid that he would throw the words up if he didn't speak them. "Yes Arthur. And you've also told me how much you like it when I'm being a girl."

Arthur's eyebrows rose so high that Merlin was afraid they would completely disappear from his forehead if he wasn't careful.

His mouth started to twitch a little, much to Arthur's disappointment as it curled up into a huge grin that he had been so desperately trying to hide. And the laugh that then escaped his perfect lips made Merlin feel weak and guilty all over again.

"Merlin" The Prince screeched. "I thought we said we were never going to mention that again."

The Warlock didn't laugh, he only smiled, and not his usual infectious smile either. No. This one was filled with fear and it didn't go unnoticed by Arthur.

"Aw, Merlin" Arthur said mockingly whilst placing a hand on the boys shoulder. "Don't worry, you know I'd never let any harm come to you." He patronised his servant, a slight deviant look shining through his eyes, but the Prince meant every word.

"Oh, is that right? And there was me thinking you were the one who always needed protecting."

"What?"

"Well, you _are_ the one who always insists on running into danger, and it's always me who is expected to come to your rescue." Although Merlin enjoyed pointing this fact out he silently cursed himself for rising to the bate.

"Is that so?" Arthur questioned doubt and humour creped its way into his voice. "Care to explain?"

"What's to explain? You get into trouble and I save you. It happens every time." He couldn't stop.

"Erm... I don't think-" Arthur began but was quickly cut off by Merlin.

"I was just on my way to your chambers, Sire." He lied. "I'll help you prepare for your trip."

"You'll be coming with me?" For once it was a question and not an order.

"Of course, who else is going to save your royal backside?" He cursed himself again.

"I don't need protecting Merlin, especially not by you."

"No, 'course not."

"Merlin"

"Yes Arthur?"

"Shut up!"

And for the first time the Warlock smiled and meant it.

He wasn't sure why, but it might have had something to do with the fact that somewhere between their childish bickering Arthur had managed to entwine his fingers with Merlin's, and although his head was telling him to pull away, his entire being was telling him to hold on.

"Yes Sire."


	4. The Citadel

A huge thank you to everyone who has Followed and/or Favorited this fic so far (: Keeps me motivated!

And a special thank you to my first Reviewer skiing Pelican, glad you're liking the story :D

* * *

Chapter 4: The Citadel

It had been a few hours since the two boys and a group of Camelot's finest Knights had set out on their journey to the Citadel.

The sun was shining, the birds were singing, and Arthur was smiling.

_What could possibly go wrong?_ Merlin asked himself. And then he remembered why they were actually on this trip.

The Citadel was home to evil, history darker than any other and its haunted echoes wanted nothing but revenge upon the Pendragon's.

A voice inside Merlin was screaming at him to stop.

_Make up an excuse. Force Arthur to turn around. Stall them, damn it, pretend to faint if you have to!_

But the boy didn't listen to his inner, much wiser voice. Instead he carried on, glancing briefly at his Prince until Arthur met his gaze, and he felt that all too familiar pain of guilt eat away at him as he returned his eyes to the path in front.

Arthur could sense Merlin's unease and craved to reach out and touch him. Comfort the boy with a – manly – hug and tell him everything was going to be fine, and that he meant it when he said he would never allow any harm to come to him, but feeling the Knights gaze burning into his back the Prince decided against it. Instead he simply said in a casual _princely_ tone "It's OK to be scared Merlin, but you don't need to be."

The Knights watched on as the Prince's manservant looked up at his master and smiled knowingly, and shock crossed each of their faces as they saw what appeared to be a wink form in Arthur's lids.

None of them would ever say anything of course, it wasn't their place to question the Prince's affairs, plus an accusation like that could lose the men their knighthoods, or worse, their heads.

* * *

It wasn't long until the men had reached the Citadel and Arthur was giving orders to the Knights, instructing them on what to do, where to go, and when to do it.

Being Prince often meant that he was the one in charge. His demands were the people's actions and where it scared Arthur; it also made him strong and wise.

He had been through many battles, seen many deaths and witnessed torture and pain unlike any other in his short life, making him yearn for victory and justice. And although it pained Arthur when on the oddity one of his Knights, his friends, were murdered in battle, he took great pride and honour in fighting for justice and leading an army into a brighter future.

On this occasion however, Arthur saw no need in planning for such great priorities. This was after all a '_ridiculous'_ quest, set out by his father to free his mind of doubt...and fear.

"We'll stick together" Arthur announced. "The Citadel is small; if we split up we'll only bump into each other." His mind was made up and everyone knew including Merlin that once Arthur had made a decision he wouldn't go back on it.

Merlin and Arthur edged closer to the ruins within the fortress; the Knights close behind them swords unsheathed, ready to attack whatever may jump out at them from beyond the shadows.

The citadel was once a friendly popular place where villagers would work, laugh, and find comfort and entertainment in one another. Camelot's flag once flew high and proud above its ancient rocks marking King Uther's reign, letting other Kingdoms know that this was _his _territory.

It was once filled with the laughter of children and the gossip of women passing in the streets.

Men would gather and talk about their families, pride showing on their friendly faces. And the sun would always beam down on its people, marking their presence with a warm glow.

But now the Citadel – that of which remained – was filled with silence, an unnerving silence that felt like it could swallow them whole into its pit of nothingness.

It's once filled streets now empty, nothing walked its cobbles. Not even curious animals that had lost track of the forest had dared to enter its boundaries. And the sun had vanished, as though it was hiding, scared to share its warmth with the emptiness.

The Citadel was as lifeless and as terrifying as Gaius had explained it to be, and Merlin could feel his heart beating viciously through his chest as the men entered one of the old chambers that had surprisingly managed to escape ruin.

"Arthur" Merlin broke the concentration that was apparent on all of the noblemen's faces.

"What is it Merlin?" he hadn't intended on sounding as blunt as he did, but truth-be-told, he was starting to see, if not feel why his father had indeed sent him to investigate the alleged sighting of smoke.

Merlin ignored the tone in Arthur's voice; he knew the Prince better than anyone and could tell he was now as nervous as he was himself. "Something's not right"

"Shh" Arthur bit back placing his free hand on Merlin's chest to stop him in his tracks, his other hand holding his sword outright in the direction of some black iron gates that stood tall at the end of the chamber. The Prince was sure he had heard a noise coming from behind the dark metal ribs.

Arthur's Knights also froze in place and listened intently for any sign of life.

Nothing.

"Arthur" Merlin tried again, but his whisper still managed to echo around the stone walls.

"Shh" Arthur replied louder this time taking his hand away from Merlin's beating heart. "Just shut up!"

Deep down he felt bad for being so harsh with him, but he would worry about that later when they were safe behind the castle walls.

And Arthur had every intention in making sure that they would be.

Merlin felt his stomach flutter and his throat knot as his eyes caught sight of something black and sinister.

As he turned around to get a better look, what he saw he wished he could erase from his memory forever.


	5. Fight to the Death

Thank you again to those who faved/reviewed/followed this story :)

* * *

Chapter 5: Fight to the Death.

Seven Knights stood in a straight line all facing the men.

They were tall and still, almost stone like, and if the situation hadn't have been so desperate they would have probably passed as harmless statues. Each one covered in a thick layer of dust which made their black armour appear silver in the meagre light.

None of them moved, instead they just stood still, staring from behind their ancient helmets as if biding their time for an attack on the men stood in front of them.

"Arthur" Merlin said again, only this time he spoke as though he was demanding the Prince's attention.

"What do you not understand about the words, shut up, Merlin?"

Arthur looked at his manservant, although it was a rhetorical question he somehow hoped to see the answer on Merlin's face. Realising however, that the boy was facing in the opposite direction he allowed his gaze to follow his servants.

He felt his breath catch in his throat and his words muddle around in his head.

How could this be possible? It was just a legend, a stupid ghost story that he and Morgana had shared when they were younger, trying to scare one another.

Arthur had never believed that the Knights of Medere actually existed and it played on the young Prince's mind. If this was true then how many more of the ghost stories that he had grown up with where also more than just suppositious nonsense?

It was an unsettling thought, one which Arthur didn't want to dwell on at the moment, nor did he have time to.

The young Prince hadn't planned for this, he hadn't instructed his men on what to do if they were attacked whilst in the Citadel. He silently cursed himself for not listening to Merlin, not heeding his father's words. "...Oh" was the only response the Prince could muster in the spare of the moment.

"Yeah" Merlin refrained from rolling his eyes and saying '_I told you so'. _Now was not the time for that. "So..."

"So..." Arthur gulped.

Loudly.

"Sire" Sir Leon, one of Camelot's finest Knights interrupted, "What should we do?" His words were muffled and quiet, as though he was trying to prevent the enemy from hearing, but Arthur noticed the bravery in his voice and made a mental note to praise him once they returned to Camelot – which they _were _going to do. –

The Knights of Medere stood still, not one of them moved evaluating their opponents from beneath their disguise. Merlin had started to wonder if they were in fact statues after all.

Maybe they hadn't seen them standing there when they'd walked in.

Maybe there was some sort of spell that erased their memories, making them forget that they had seen the seven Knights at all.

There was no denying that there was magic in the room, in the city, in the fortress, it was everywhere and Merlin could feel it within him.

It clung to the air attracting every single one of the young Warlocks senses. He could hear the magic, feel it, taste it, smell it, and were there not other people around him, Merlin could have probably reached out and touched it.

Whatever type of magic this was, it was far greater than he believed himself to possess. It was strong and powerful, and- and mesmerising.

In all honesty magic didn't scare Merlin, yes it could be used for great evils, and in this case it probably _was _being used for just that, but he was himself a sorcerer. He harboured the same type of gift, he had studied it and practiced in it and was completely aware of the mere miracles it could create.

To Merlin magic was a way of life.

It was _his _life.

* * *

Just about to give orders to his men who had held their own in this ridiculous staring contest that this was shaping out to be, the Knights of Medere made their first visible move to the nobles.

In a synchronised pattern the seven Knights started to break free from the apparent hold that had taken over them.

First their fingers and wrists moved stiffly, each joint that freed making a sickening noise that filled the air. Then their arms, shoulders, neck all gaining character.

The way they moved reminded Merlin of the time Arthur had made him train all day, resulting in his muscles ceasing and restricting his movement for the next few days, – all of which to Arthur's annoyance – but of course this was slightly different.

These Knights had been frozen in place for 300 years, only now seeking their revenge.

Pretty soon all of the nobles were crouched in mid air grabbing at their ears, trying desperately to escape the sounds that tortured them as the rest of the seven Knights limbs were freed from inflexibility.

Then that was it, just like that, war had been declared upon Camelot.

Again in a synchronized pattern all seven Knights of Medere raised their swords in the most murderous way they could have managed.

This was a fight to the death and every man knew just that.

"Defend yourself, take no prisoners!" Arthur gave the command.

And with that the nobles also leaped into action, swerving the seven Knights metal swords and raising their own in defence. The sound of metal hitting metal rang throughout the Citadel, the odd cry from an injured man joined by thuds as one would fall to the ground in defeat.

Looking around Arthur took quick note that his men were holding their own; however it was also only his men that had been taken prisoner and collapsed in an inevitable painful death, and it hurt the young Prince to see.

"Merlin" The Prince's thoughts were suddenly filled with his defenceless manservant and panic hit him.

Fast.

Returning to the fight after hearing no reply from an again missing Merlin, Arthur was taken by surprise and his sword was plunged from his hand by his opponent's metal weapon.

He was now defenceless and on the verge of a panic attack, the Knight who had chosen to take the Prince on as its competitor took full advantage of the Prince's hesitation and thrust its sword down towards the future King. Arthur, only just managing to pull himself together, swerved the murder attempt with a dive and roll, but something wasn't right.

As much as he would like to believe – and he _would_ like to believe – that he had impeccable reflexes, he knew deep down that if that Knight had truly wanted him dead then he could have just granted his own wish. For some reason though the Knight had slowed down, only moderately but still noticeable for someone as skilled as Arthur to see.

Not wanting to think too much of this and just simply thanking his lucky stars that the Knight had held back, Arthur looked around again. All of his nobles, bar two or three who had fallen during battle, were still standing, but still there was no Merlin.

"Arthur" he finally heard the voice of what he believed to be an angel under the circumstances and he flew his gaze towards it.

"Where the hell have you been?" Arthur took a breath of relief after laying eyes upon his manservant, almost forgetting where and what he was doing.

"Look out!"

Again he swerved the murder attempt - or _false_ attempt if he wasn't mistaken –

The Knight of Medere had slowed his actions, almost teasing the Prince with death.

"Arthur catch" Merlin obviously in a complete frenzy himself grabbed Arthur's sword that had mere moments before been flung to the ground, and threw it rather precisely at the awaiting Prince.

With a moment's hesitation he drove the blade through his opponents armour. The Knight may have shown him mercy, but he wasn't about to do the same, after all blood had been shed and it was the blood of his friends.

A twinge of guilt hit the Prince as the Knight keeled over in apparent death; the relief now clear on Merlin's face as he believed Arthur to be winning this fight. But not for long did either of the men's emotions last as once more the Knight of Medere woke from its still death, neither hurt nor put off by the blow, it sprung back to life sword at the ready.

Arthur was completely bewildered; he had never seen anything like it, an army of immortal Knights who most worryingly were looking for some kind of revenge upon his Kingdom.

Merlin froze in shock horror in the corner of the murky chamber, scared to move in case he caused something more terrible than the display in front of him.

He was terrified, ominously still as reality hit the young Warlock.

He could stop this...well, probably not stop it, but he could at least aid in the fight, using his magic as his own weapon against the immortal Knights.

This was it.

This had to be it.

_Didn't it? _

He wasn't even sure anymore, all he knew was that whatever he felt for Arthur, no matter how strong his feelings were towards his Prince, they would all surely die in this battle if he didn't dig deep for the courage to reveal all.

Merlin didn't care about his own life, he knew full well that by revealing his powers he would stand great chance of being executed at King Uther's hand, but that wasn't what was stopping him.

Arthur. That stupid, arrogant, prat who he cared more for than anyone else in the world, who he would die a million deaths for, who he would gladly give his last breath if the Prince should ever need it.

Arthur was the reason he couldn't - he just _couldn't _- reveal who he really was.

Sure he could manage with the hatred his lover would feel for him, the disgust and pity, the even probable death. But the hurt, he couldn't make Arthur hurt, not again, not after the years of disbelief and agony the Prince had gone through with Gwen and Lancelot, and with his father's tough love and discipline.

...But he had to, _right_?

He had to hurt Arthur...to save his life!

Digging deep for the courage and the self reassurance that this _was_ the right thing to do, Merlin ran through the possible spells in his head.

* * *

Arthur was still on his feet along with nine of his own Knights, and with every swing he found himself getting more and more confident with the immortals.

Although they couldn't die, and they _were_ looking to cause death – four of his own Knights now motionless on the blood stained floor proof of that – he couldn't help but think he was winning this battle.

Every time a dark Knight would get even moderately close to finishing the young Prince off, it would falter and miss, or slow down allowing its competitor to defend himself.

Arthur was also now completely aware of Merlin's whereabouts and he wasn't going to lose sight of him again.

He was also vaguely aware that thankfully none of the Knights seemed to be paying much attention to the weakling of the group; instead they focused their attentions on the nobles, – who each must have dealt a mortal blow to the dark Knight's five times or more before they had sprung back to life and accused with their swords – but even so Arthur wasn't about to take any chances.

"Merlin, get out of here!" He screamed at his servant who he noticed was still standing in the corner of the room, back against the cold stone wall looking deep in thought.

It seemed to break Merlin's obvious concentration though as he looked up from where he was standing and registered the Prince's order.

"NOW!" Arthur was beginning to lose patients, he wanted Merlin to run! Get out of there whilst he seemed to be safe from target, yet instead the idiot just stood there, disobedient and confused.

And to make matters worse Merlin ran towards Arthur.

The Warlock wasn't even quite sure why he did it; it was almost as if he had been pulled to Arthur's side by an invisible force.

Under so much pressure no spell was entering his mind; in fact, _nothing_ magical was entering his mind, only his own confession and when he felt Arthur's strong hands push him away and his voice scream at him to leave, he was momentarily pulled from his thoughts – or lack of –

Seemingly completely oblivious to his surroundings Merlin looked towards Arthur, hurt in his eyes and confession on his lips.

This was it; definitely, this was the moment that Merlin would tell Arthur Pendragon the complete truth about his life.


	6. I'll Do Anything

Thank you once again to those who have Faved and/or Followed the story so far. And another big thank you to skiing Pelican for reviewing the last 3 chapters(: Puts a smile on my face to know you're all enjoying it :D

Btw, the recent Merlin news, heartbreaking! It's been an amazing five years and though this is the end, I wouldn't change any of it (:

Loved every minute! LONG LIVE MERLIN! ;)

* * *

Chapter 6: I'll do anything

Merlin drew a deep breath that he didn't want to let go of...About to reveal his darkest, most guarded secrets, "Arthur I..." he began, though his voice was but a whisper.

He breathed again as the Prince met his gaze, eyes full o fear, but the young Warlock was cut from his declaration of guilt when the room lit with the brightest of lights and unexpectedly everything froze in its place.

The Knights of Medere grew still once more.

Weapons that had been flung into the air were held there in levitation.

The noble men also grew completely frozen, the looks of anger and fear etched into their faces, as if painted on perfectly.

Blood clung to the air in precise patterns and dust hung waiting to be released.

Everything was frozen in battle, everything but the young Warlock, Merlin, and his Master, Arthur Pendragon.

* * *

For a brief moment neither of the boys said anything. Instead they looked around them in complete awe of the sight that played out in front of them.

Arthur's men, his knights, his friends, stuck in what appeared to be an eternity of stillness. The seven Knights of Medere, who were once furious, dark, and intimidating, yet surprisingly slow, also joined the nobles in their still fate.

Merlin and Arthur apparently the only two who were still able to move at will.

Merlin swallowed hard and the gulp seemed to echo around the abnormal silence, which for the first time distracted the Prince's attention from the mystifying view.

"What's happened?" Arthur managed to dig deep and find the words to ask Merlin. He knew full well what the reply would be, but he had to ask.

"I don't know" Merlin admitted, once again proving Arthur right. "They've all...frozen"

"_No really_?"

Merlin wondered how Arthur could be so sarcastic in times like these. Not that things like this happened all the time of course. It was true that Camelot barely ever saw a normal day, but this was beyond anything the Kingdom had been faced with before. If Camelot and its people were to grow still, it could be taken from the King without warning.

"Are you alright?" The Warlock totally forgetting about his plans to reveal his true nature to the Prince, his thoughts now clouded with Arthur's wellbeing.

"I'm fine" Arthur was still looking around whilst he spoke, utterly taken aback and scared, and though he would not admit it; he didn't know what to do. "What about you?"

"Yeah...me too" confusion grew on his face. "But why?"

Arthur now drew his gaze from his surroundings and looked at Merlin in concern "Why didn't you run when I told you to?"

The younger boy looked as though he was trying to remember something.

_Probably trying to come up with some ridiculous excuse as to why he disobeyed the Prince's order_.

"There was...something-something that I was going to tell you" the lines of confusion now lay deeper on Merlin's face.

"What?"

"I- I can't remember"

The two boys stared at each other as if trying to read from the others expression what they needed to know.

"Arthur, I can't remember...It was something...something important- something big. Why can't I remember?"

Merlin was starting to panic now, more than he was before as he desperately tried to remember what he was going to tell Arthur. The young boy felt empty inside, lost and petrified like one of his vital organs had just been ripped from inside of him. This thing- this thing he had forgotten, it had taken his identity and tore at his soul, he felt like a puzzle with a missing piece, meaningless and miserably different.

The Prince looked on, utterly confused and concerned. "Merlin" Arthur reached out his shaking hand and placed it on Merlin's shoulder. He somehow believed that holding his manservant would make all of this disappear; make sense of the world again. And clearly Merlin felt the same as he walked into the open arms and curled himself around his Prince.

It was warm there, safe and understanding, wrapped inside Arthur's strong arms that wished no harm upon him. He felt secure and loved and when Merlin closed his eyes he could imagine them back in the Castle, back in Arthur's chambers, back to his normal life pretending he was a mere servant to the Prince when secretly he was everything to him.

Lost in the embrace Arthur let go of the words he so desperately wanted to keep to himself. "I'm scared, Merlin"

The serving boy had calmed down now, only slightly from the Prince's touch, his head buried into Arthur's neck where things made a little more sense. "I know" he whispered into his ear "me too."

A loud noise again broke the silence, also shattering the boys heart to heart as they pulled away from each other scared someone might see.

When without warning deafening screams filled the room, bouncing off the walls and filling the Warlock's ears with pain as he clenched at his head in desperation.

Arthur it seemed couldn't hear the sounds that tortured his servant, and the concern that took over his body now was more apparent than it had been in the entire time they had arrived at the citadel. Just about to grab Merlin in a frantic state, he saw what he could only describe as hell. "MERLIN"!

The Knight that had grown so still after its battle with the future ruler of the kingdom once more sprung to life, only this time it wasn't intending on showing the mercy that it had done whilst fighting Arthur. Sword at the ready the Knight of Medere pushed the Prince out of the way and with one strike from its heavy weapon the young servant dropped to the floor in defeat.

His hands now leaving his pain filled ears and grabbing at his wounded stomach. The Warlocks eyes were wide in pain and fear, and his frame weak, almost childlike as he curled into a desperate ball.

..."MERLIN"!

Without thought Arthur unsheathed his tired sword and dived at the Knight who had just so brutally injured his precious servant. Growling as he plunged the sword into the Knight's armour, fury etched into Arthur's features as tears ran down his red raged face. "NO" He screamed as he repeatedly attacked with his weapon. "NO! NO! NO!" Each word dealt another blow to the dark Knight stood before him.

After what felt like hours - though was in truth only a few seconds - of attacking the Knight which hadn't been affected in the slightest, nor had it fought back, Arthur dropped to his knees and scrambled across the floor to his wounded servant.

* * *

Merlin just lay there breathless and cold seemingly unaware of his surroundings. He didn't understand what had just happened to him. One minute he was in the Prince's arms and the next he was in excruciating pain, lying in a pool of his own blood, awaiting the moment he would surely die, and knowing that there was something desperately important he needed to tell his Prince.

And then all thought of pain and confusion left him as his thoughts were clouded with the only good thing in his life.

Arthur.

_Is he ok? How will he escape? Will he cope without me? Will he forgive me for leaving? _

Arthur... Arthur... "Arth...ur"

Merlin suddenly became aware of Arthur's strong arms cradling his head, pulling his limp body onto his waiting lap, and his long fingers stroking the sides of his cheeks, wiping away the tears that had escaped during the moments of agonizing terror.

"Shh, Merlin you're going to fine" He heard Arthur's weak voice breaking with tears as he tried to soothe him.

Merlin tried to speak clearly, but the knot in his throat and the pain crippling his body wouldn't allow it. "Ar...thur"

"Merlin, please try not to speak"

Everything was a blur. It was like the young Warlock had gone blind, all colours merged into one big mess and then faded to black. He squeezed his eyes shut tightly hoping to gain some control over his sight once he opened them again. If he was to die then he wanted nothing more than to be able to see his lover one last time.

To Merlin's delight when he opened his eyes he could see nothing but Arthur's loving face, everything else faded into the background as if it was unimportant to him anymore.

Arthur shushed Merlin again raising his finger to the servant's chapped perked lips, hushing him before he had time to speak.

"There's...Some..thing"

"Damn it Merlin, will you ever listen to anything I say" Arthur bit back but there was no anger in his voice, just hurt and fear.

"No" Merlin managed a little laugh in his defence but soon regretted his action as a crippling pain shot through his body, like a reminder that he wasn't supposed to be happy right now. Desperate to hide his pain from Arthur, Merlin bit his lip and clenched his body hoping it would go unnoticed – it didn't –

"Merlin" He felt Arthur's strong protecting hands hold at his wound, as if by doing that he could somehow take all of Merlin's pain away. Instead his hands drowned in the blood that poured from the open injury and Merlin saw in Arthur's eyes the look of desperation and panic, and he wasn't used to it, no one was.

Arthur had always been strong and disciplined. Always kept his barriers up, even when it was just him and Merlin. It was only on rare occasions the Prince's guard would be down and his emotions would be etched onto his face, like an old man would bare wrinkles, and it pained Merlin more than any wound ever could.

"Please" Merlin gasped for the air to finish his sentence, surprisingly allowed by Arthur. "Please, don't be sad."

Arthur sniffed, he couldn't do it anymore, whatever he had been trying to conceal in his tight throat was given permission to leave. Tears beaded from his eyes, sounds of uncontrolled sobbing left his mouth, and his body shook in time with every whimper.

"Now who's not doing as they're told?" Merlin smiled, though he was dying both inside and out. He reached up a trembling hand and tried his best to place it on Arthur's perfectly shaped face. "Please" Merlin begged as he tried to carm Arthur down so he could speak. "Please" Merlin whispered again, losing life with every word.

Arthur laid his forehead on top of Merlin's and held his servants hand in place, which was still cupped around his own face. His tears now rolled down his cheeks and onto Merlin's but neither of them cared. They just continued to stare into each other's fading eyes.

"Arthur, I-" Merlin began, but Arthur soon cut him off.

"Don't."

Merlin's chin creased and his eyebrows narrowed until he too was crying desperately. "I'm so sorry"

"No" Arthur closed his eyes and shook his head in denial. He knew full well what Merlin was going to say and he was having none of it. He couldn't- he _wouldn't_ hear Merlin's, _his_ Merlin's goodbye.

"Arthur...you've always meant so much to me...you know that."

Arthur squeezed his eyes even tighter hoping to block out everything that was happening.

"Look at me"

The Prince ignored the request, his tears fighting the back of his eyelids.

"Look at me" Merlin repeated, desperate for Arthur to listen to his final words.

With that Arthur simply couldn't ignore what was happening anymore, he had to obey the order, he had to see those blue eyes that he loved more than anything else, and that grin which even under the circumstances he knew would still be etched onto his manservant's broken face.

"You're the bravest man I've ever known Arthur... I'm so...so proud of you" Merlin took a deep breath; he wasn't sure whether it was because of the pain, or because he was trying so hard to get rid of the lump in his swollen throat. "And I know that one day...one day you will be a great King" he chuckled silently with pride as he pictured Arthur being crowned. "You will be the greatest Camelot has ever known, not to mention the most handsome."

"No, not without you" Arthur ignored the compliment, too scared of what might happen if he dared to smile.

"You don't need me anymore Arthur; I've seen the man you have become-"

"I do, I do need you, more than anything" Arthur cut Merlin off, not wanting him to think that he didn't need him when in fact it felt like he had never needed the boy more.

Merlin just carried on, ignoring Arthur's attempt at correcting him. "You're strong Arthur, you're wise and brave and one day..." Merlin's lips twitched into a crooked, cheeky smile, allowing more tears to pour from his waning eyes "one day you may even be able to dress yourself."

With that both Merlin and Arthur let out a short stifled laugh, but the humour was short lived and Arthur's smile dropped back down into an arched thrown. The pain in Merlin's eyes now pierced Arthur's as the Warlock pushed at his wound in an attempt to stop the torture that prolonged there.

Again the boy struggled on as he continued with what he had to say before it was too late. "But seriously, you must learn to take advice...not...not everyone is your enemy, so ma...many people respect you Arthur, you just have to let them in, show them the real you, the real Arthur Pendragon" Merlin smiled as if recalling a distant memory, "he's the one the people want to rule them."

Arthur just stared at Merlin in amazement, he had not realised how wise the young boy actually was until that very moment, and it astounded him.

How had he not noticed?

Almost everything the Prince had done was because Merlin had guided him into it, told him it was right. Merlin had always been there for him whenever he needed advice or help, if there was a difficult decision to be made then all Arthur had to do was turn around and Merlin was there, always there!

It was as if the young Prince had been shown a whole new side to his manservant, maybe Merlin wasn't so useless after all, maybe he was more capable of things than Arthur had given him credit for.

"You're amazing" Arthur shook his head in utter disbelief that he was truly only discovering this side of Merlin for the first time.

The fading Warlock smiled a weak smile at the compliment.

"Really you are. You're the best thing to ever happen to me, Merlin. I don't know what I'd..." His face dropped in realisation "..I don't know what I'd do without you" The confession scared the Prince, it was as though he was only just realising it himself as the words left his quivering mouth.

Merlin's tears came faster now as his chin wrinkled and his forehead creased. "You need to leave, Arthur"

"What?" The future King was truly shocked; if Merlin expected him to leave then he must have been delusional.

Merlin tilted his head slightly to look around him for the first time since the attack. "Something's not right. I was going to tell you something and then I forgot, just like that. It doesn't make sense. The Knights could wake up any minute and attack, just please go!" Merlin was begging now, the plea in his voice was unmistakable and Arthur wanted to scream at him to stop. If he was to be honest then he didn't actually care if he was attacked, he felt that without Merlin he may as well be dead anyway.

"Please Arthur...all I...all I ask is that you are safe"

"This can't be happening. No...I won't go back to Camelot without you."

"Go" Merlin nodded his head encouragingly "Go!"

"No"

"Yes" the Warlock gasped again for air, each breath becoming shorter and shorter as he started to panic. "I...I love...I love you" he struggled.

Arthur shook his head.

"L...isten to me" Merlin's voice was now a whisper and Arthur had to come closer to hear what he was saying.

Merlin realised that everything was once more fading into nothing. Arthur was a mere outline, a shadow in the dark though the room was perfectly lit. His surroundings now gone completely. He took his lasts breaths and struggled to say, "I love you Arthur, I al...ways have now please, please go, and be happy. Be the man I know you can be."

"Merlin no, please don't leave me."

But it was too late, the troubled Warlock had gone.

His eyes closed so peacefully that if there wasn't so much blood and trauma surrounding him; he could have easily been mistaken as sleeping, lost in a dream as one last tear escaped his sorry eyes and rolled down his red rubbed face. His mouth open slightly as if he was going to wake up and say one last thing to the awaiting Prince.

Arthur pulled the lifeless body of his beloved manservant into a tight hug, managing to bury his own head into Merlin's stiff neck as he cried into the perfect skin there, praying he would return the embrace.

"Please, please come back, I'll do anything, anything just wake up, please" Arthur pleaded as his body jolted with every short breath, tears streamed down his face as he shuck Merlin's limp body for response.

Nothing happened, no miracle or marvel, no light in the dark or paranormal experience. Merlin remained 'asleep' and Arthur heartbroken.

Until...

"Anything?"


	7. The Truth

Again, massive thank you to all followers/faves and reviews (: hope you like the new chapter.

And of course enjoy the end of Merlin in the coming days :( aw, can't believe it's almost over...forever! It's going to be AMAZING though, isn't it? :'D They're definitely going out with a bang! ;)

Merry Christmas everyone, hope you all have a lovely few weeks and a Happy New Year!

Will update sometime in 2013, but until then, here's chapter 7! Enjoy :D X

* * *

Chapter 7: The Truth

"Anything?"

Came a voice from in front of where the young Prince cradled his lost servant.

Arthur jumped on the spot as his head flung up in alert. "Who are you?" he scanned the room for any sight of the body belonging to the voice.

"Who I am is not important, who you are however, is."

Arthur wasn't expecting this, he was so confused and hurt and angry that he didn't have the patience for riddles and longwinded conversations with someone who was surely going to kill him anyway.

"If you're here to kill me then get on with it, I won't fight back." And he meant every word, if this new presence wanted him dead then he wasn't going to protest, without Merlin he was dead anyway.

"I am not here to kill you Arthur Pendragon, you are far too important to die at my hand."

The voice belonged to what Arthur believed to be a man. It was loud but subtle and knowing, filled with depth and warmth, but as it spoke the air seemed dense and thin.

Arthur for a split second thought that it was the voice of god, but something deep in the man's tone revealed evil and deceit, almost as if two people were speaking at once, like a kind innocent man had been possessed by malevolence and anger, the acidic tone fighting its way through the honeyed pitch as the voice proceeded speak, giving Arthur chills.

"You see Pendragon today was no accident. You were lead here to the fortress of Idirsholas by your destiny, and now it wishes to test you."

"What are you talking about?" Arthur still remained folded on the floor, covered in Merlin's blood and holding onto the boy with the fear of him disappearing if he were to let go.

Then anger suddenly filled Arthur's body and the knot in his throat returned bigger than before, almost suffocating him as he held the tears back. "Was this you? Did you- did you do this, did you take him away from me?"

The man laughed in tepid amusement which echoed around the chamber in response. "It is not I that did this, nor is it I that can fix it. Only you hold the answers to the questions you speak."

"What?" Arthur's voice broke as once again the tears were allowed to surface and his emotions were displayed on his face.

"The Knights of Medere were showing you mercy, were they not?"

The young Prince's head creased as he glanced quickly at the Knight who had murdered Merlin.

"No" he dropped his head once more and sobbed into Merlin's thick black hair. "They killed him, they killed Merlin and he did _nothing_. They know no mercy"

"Ah, but that was the boy your majesty. I asked if they showed you mercy."

Arthur looked up again anger etched into his face and tears staining every crease of disbelief. "Me? If they wanted to show me any kind of clemency then they should not have declared war upon my kingdom, but now because of them, my men, Merlin, they're all gone! What's a Prince if he cannot protect the people he cares most for?!" Arthur scanned the room fiercely, his head moving in every direction trying to find where the man could be hiding.

"The kind of Prince you are is yet to be tested, Pendragon." The voice remained carm and unnatural, it hadn't changed or altered during the conversation and Arthur was starting to lose patience.

"Show yourself!" he raised his voice as the irritation started to surface.

"I shall but first you must know the truth."

"The truth? The truth about what?"

"You said that you would do anything to bring back the life of the boy?" The voice asked in anticipation.

For the first time since Merlin had left, Arthur's own life seemed to return. His shoulders squared and his back straightened as a flicker of hope skipped through his heart. "Yes, YES anything... just tell me what to do and I'll do it!"

Again the man laughed sarcastically, as if Arthur was a fool to think it would be so easy to bring Merlin back.

"Tell me, please. If there's a way I have to try."

"All in good time my Prince, but first you must know the truth."

"Then tell me, what are you are waiting for? Tell me the truth, please!"

"I cannot tell you all you need to know for you must see it yourself."

"See it myself, wha...what are you talking about?" The desperation in Arthur's voice was now more apparent than ever and Arthur could tell that the man revelled in his pain.

There was no reply, just the distant cackle of amusement.

"SHOW ME!" Arthur screamed into the cold air, the echo ringing throughout the room.

"I shall, but beware young Prince for once you have seen the past; you must then decide the future."

"I don't care, anything just...just please show me, let me help Merlin, let me at least _try_ to help them all."

"Very well"

Suddenly there was a huge flash of light that lit the room with colour, highlighting the tragedy that had taken place in the fortress, until it all faded into sheik patterns of Gold, Silver and Grey that danced in front of Arthur's eyes.

As the Prince watched in astonishment the scene before him slowly transformed into still images and then as if by magic – which this obviously was - they developed movement and pace, playing out memories from the Prince's past.

Merlin. He was there; he was alive in what Arthur could only explain as an outer body experience. At first the Prince was shown happy memories in which he and Merlin were riding through the Kingdom, their happiness plastered on each of their faces as they raced through the forest on horseback.

He was shown evenings in which he and the boy had shared stories of growing up, and the mornings in which Merlin would stumble into Arthur's chamber, half an hour late with a sorry grin plastered on his cheery face.

It was as if Arthur was being shown the very moments in which he had started to fall in love with Merlin, and as images of their first kiss played out in front of him the Prince felt a flutter of happiness dance through his heart, and tears again threatened to spill as he watched on in awe.

He remembered it all so well; the way Merlin had looked deep into his eyes, the look of lust and desire that clouded his servants face, giving Arthur Goosebumps. And the way his own gaze had dropped to his servants parted lips, finding himself in a trance, praying that the boy would move closer.

He relived the motions, the fear, the confusion, the lust...his idiot serving boy being the only thing on his mind day and night, that constant flutter in his stomach that would find its way to his heart whenever Merlin was around. And that blasted blush that would creep up his neck and warm his cheeks whenever Merlin would dress or brush past him in the corridors.

As the heir watched and felt himself falling in love with Merlin all over again he almost forgot the reason why all of this was happening, until he reluctantly looked down at Merlin's pallid body.

As a heartbroken Arthur took in the sight that lay in his arms a single tear dropped down from his eye and landed on Merlin's pasty cheek. "This is my fault" Arthur sobbed in regret. "It should have been me."

Then suddenly the Prince heard "I can't do this anymore Gaius, I won't. I have to tell him, I have to tell Arthur the truth." It was Merlin. That voice was unmistakable and it was the only thing in the whole world that Arthur wanted to hear. As his head shot up from where it hung his eyes set sight on his servant talking to the court physician back in the castle.

"Don't be so stupid" Gaius bit back at the boy. "If Arthur finds out about you then you will surely die, Merlin."

What?

Arthur looked on in confusion.

What on earth were they talking about, if he was to find out what? And Merlin would die? Did they honestly believe that he was capable of hurting him? Surely whatever it was the two of them should have known that he would never hurt Merlin, never!

"I don't care" Merlin shook his head whilst pacing the physician's workplace. "I can't carry on lying to him anymore, not now..." Merlin paused "now things have changed."

The old physician looked up at his beloved friend in concern. Gaius had always been like a father to Merlin and he took pride in his duties as the boys' carer whilst he lived in Camelot. The two of them had proved their loyalties to one another on many occasions, and now it seemed that Gaius was trying to protect the boy from himself.

"Merlin, I know you care for the Prince, as do we all, but now is not the time for such revelations" The old man's face dropped in sorrow for Merlin, although the Warlock didn't know it, Gaius wasn't as clueless about his relationship with the future King as he would have like him to be. "Arthur is just a boy; he is not yet ready for the truth"

"You're wrong"...

Arthur was so confused now, he desperately wanted to know what the secret was that Merlin had kept from him, what he himself was supposedly too young to hear. He thought he knew Merlin better than anyone, but it was now dawning on him that there was possibly something big lurking in the shadows of these memories, and he almost didn't want to face what was coming.

Suddenly the picture faded into grey and formed another time in Merlin's past. This time Merlin was walking down steep stairs, he was holding a torch in his hand and his eyes were red as though he had been crying. It was night time, Arthur knew because Merlin was wearing his night cloths, and wherever he was it was pitch black.

As the young boy eventually got to the bottom of the staircase the sudden whereabouts of his servant became clear to him.

"The Great Dragon" Arthur gasped in disbelief. What the hell was going on, why was Merlin underneath the castle with the monster that had killed so many of his people.

"I need your help"

Arthur listened as Merlin begged the Dragon to appear to him.

"PLEASE" Merlin shouted, the plea echoing off of everything rock and hitting Arthur like a ton of bricks.

All of a sudden there was what sounded like a gust of wind burst through the caves, and chains rattled loudly smashing on every rock that imprisoned the monster beneath the Castle of Camelot- a mere trophy for the King who had captured it.

The Great Dragon landed quite purposefully on one of the perched boulders in front of the distressed boy. "What troubles do you bring for me this time, Merlin?" The Dragon sighed with lack of enthusiasm.

'_This time?_' Arthur repeated to himself, so this wasn't the first time Merlin had visited the Dragon? How long had this been going on for, and most importantly, why?

"I can't do this anymore; please, there has to be another way. I need to tell him the truth"

"I presume that by '_him_' you mean the young Prince?"

"I cannot keep on lying to him. Surely if we leave it too long he will only end up hating me and everything that I am."

The Dragon looked down at Merlin with a look of true concern as the boys' tears shed from his tired eyes.

"I see this is distressing you Merlin"

The Warlock swallowed hard as he tried to hide his emotions from the watching beast before him. He quickly wiped his eyes on the sleeve of his pail, crumpled tunic and returned his gaze to the Dragon.

"I just need him to know who I really I am...please" Merlin stuttered through his emotions.

"It is not yet time to tell Arthur the truth, Merlin. If you do then the future you are both destined to share may be destroyed and Albion will never be reborn."

Albion? Arthur thought to himself as he watched on in concern and confusion at the scene in front of him. Why would Merlin be interested in Albion?

"It is _Arthur_; I can't go on lying to him like this anymore, whatever it is you think I'm supposed to do-"

"So you have come all the way down here to tell me that I am wrong" The Dragon interrupted, unimpressed with the way the conversation was going.

"Whatever it is you think I'm supposed to do" Merlin repeated "you're wrong. Me and Arthur..." Merlin bowed his head in guilt. "If he cannot know the real me then there's no point."

"One day the Prince will know the real you and all you have done for him. Until then you must protect and guide the future King. Albion rests on your shoulders"

With that the image once more faded into a collection of greys and left the Prince mystified and hurt.

'_Everything you have done for him' _the words rang in Arthur's mind like the warning bells did back in Camelot. Something was happening, something was changing, and he didn't want to know what it was.

"No, stop, stop I don't want to see anymore" Arthur ordered, weakly. Whatever this was it was trying to destroy the memories he had shared with Merlin, trying to tear every piece of trust he had managed to build with the boy and he didn't want it to go any further. Whatever the secret was he wished it to remain as that - a secret.

There was however no response to Arthur's request and instead the dark clouds formed another pattern. This time of Merlin alone in his chamber, crying into a damp pillow. "Merlin, are you in there?" A voice said vaguely, it was Arthur, he was hearing his own voice from beyond the image but had no recollection of the memory at all.

Merlin stood almost immediately at the sound of Arthur's voice and quickly scanned the room for something - a book. The Prince witnessed the young servant grab a book and hide it beneath his floorboards. Then he stood once more to adjust his bed sheets and flip his cushion onto the dry side, hiding any evidence of his upset in the surroundings. He then wiped the strangled tears from his raw face and opened the door to Arthur.

"Arthur?" He smiled and greeted the Prince.

The Pendragon walked into the small rigid chamber unannounced and looked around suspiciously. "You took your time"

"Yes I was- I was sleeping"

"Oh"

"Yeah, did you want something?"

Arthur continued to stare at the figures in front of him, the memory slowly returning to his tiring mind.

"Yes" The Prince replied in a characteristic way, as if he were acting out a scene from a play. "Yes Merlin, I need some advice... about... polishing" He said loudly, obviously trying to get Gaius's attention from outside the room.

Merlin laughed at his failed attempts to come up with something convincing and wise. "Ah polishing" he replied knowingly. "And you want me to..."

They both stopped and looked at each other expectantly.

"Demonstrate-" Arthur quipped.

"The polishing-"

"Exactly-"

"Obviously."

Back in the present, Arthur laughed lightly at how ridiculous they must have sounded to Gaius who was working just outside the room.

He remembered it all now; he had woken up that morning and wanted to see Merlin without raising suspicion. He had given the boy the morning off and wished he hadn't the minute he'd said it.

He remembered the conversation they'd had the night before about Merlin being overworked and needing a day off, but how Arthur wasn't willing to lose a whole day of his company - after all teasing Merlin to his face and seeing his reaction was a lot more fun than calling him names behind his back. –

Arthur could remember everything about that day now, but what bugged him was that he never once noticed how sad Merlin looked.

Watching it now it was obvious; Merlin's face was red, his smile a little smaller, his frame a little weaker, and his eyes, sad and disenchanted. How could Arthur not have seen how hurt and worried he was? It broke his heart to see how utterly oblivious he had been to Merlin's emotions.

"Hmm so"

The voices continued.

"Best go to your chambers and... demonstrate?" Merlin said whilst opening the door, giving Arthur the signal to leave.

"Good idea"

"Sorry Gaius, I have to go and-"

"Polish, yes I heard." Gaius replied to Merlin, smiling at Arthur as he shuffled past nervously. "Sire, why is it exactly you need to learn how to polish?" Gaius knowingly teased.

"Oh... err... well-"

"Every future King should know how to polish his armour Gaius, even if he does have absolutely_ no_ intention of actually doing it himself."

"Ah, of course" Gaius mocked, pretending not to know the true reason of Merlin's departure.

With that the two of them left the court physician to his work and the scene once more faded to grey.

Arthur was so confused. How had Merlin managed to act so contented when he was blatantly falling apart inside? How long had he been feeling that way without him even noticing that something was wrong? And more to the point, why had Merlin been feeling that way? What was so bad and so distressing that he couldn't confide in Arthur?

The Prince also felt hurt, Merlin had known everything about him. He never kept secrets and never lied and now it seemed that was all Merlin had done.

Lie, pretend...act.

The young Prince was beginning to lose his trust and he could feel it slipping away as he desperately tried to hold onto it.

Before long the grey mist formed another pattern, this time Arthur recognised it straight away.

Cedric.

He remembered the man whom he believed to be loyal to himself and to Camelot. He had thought that Cedric was a friend of the Kingdom and when he'd offered his services to the Prince of course Arthur hadn't refused- much to Merlin's annoyance. He remembered how much Merlin disliked Cedric, and how he had accused the tall, undernourished man of being a traitor, possessed by the spirit of Cornelius Sigan, an evil sorcerer back for revenge.

Merlin had even started a fight with the man, an actual physical fight, one of which Arthur hadn't given Merlin enough credit for, for a physically weak man Merlin knew how to throw a punch - even if it were at someone as weak as himself.

Arthur saw himself outside, fighting, defending, screaming at the giant stone gargoyles that had come to life within the grounds of the realm. He remembered how vicious and terrifying they were, and how he genuinely feared for his life and for his Kingdom.

He witnessed himself being knocked unconscious by one of the solid demons and flinched at the pain he remembered feeling.

And then there he was. Merlin. The same Merlin he had thrown in the dungeons that very night for attacking Cedric. The same Merlin who should have still been locked away, safe.

Back in the present Arthur looked down once more at the body that rested peacefully in his arms. He could feel himself losing that confidence in Merlin, losing that respect and trust and it was killing him inside.

Not feeling comfortable holding him in his arms any longer Arthur slowly placed the boy onto the floor, carefully cradling his head wary of hurting him – not that it was possible any longer, but those thoughts were forbidden. –

The Prince got to his feet unsteadily and almost fell straight back down again as his knees buckled and shook, struggling to carry the weight of his armour and broken, shattered heart.

Taking a moment to steady himself Arthur walked closer to the magic, closer to 'the truth' and closer to the agonising secret that he so desperately didn't want to hear.

He stood so close that he could have easily mistaken this as real life, like he was there once more reliving the nightmare that was Cornelius Sigan.

Déjà vu was always a strange thing to experience, but this was triple that and truth-be-told it frightened him, but what he saw next frightened him even more. It tore at his insides, ripped them up, spat them out, and stood on them one by one, and he felt every agonizing bit of it. "No"

It was...magic. Undeniable, unforgiving, unacceptable, evil, magic, and it was coming from the man he thought he had loved and trusted more than anyone, more than anything in his entire world.

He saw Merlin utter words in a foreign language, the old religion if he wasn't mistaken, and then the Gargoyle was gone, shattered into a million pieces, crumbled into dust and sinister cloud.

He watched as the boy ran towards him, checking he was ok, still breathing, still alive, and it didn't end there, though he silently wished that it had.

Sigan walked from the shadows and addressed the serving boy; he was propositioning him, actually trying to get Merlin to be Arthur's enemy.

The Prince stood in the frozen room, the lump in his throat was suffocating and the tears that had dried were once again set free to stain his cheeks and track his hurt. His fists were turning white as they clenched and his fingernails dug deep into the palm of his hands, cutting him slightly.

He couldn't believe it, he could not believe what he was seeing, what he was witnessing, but it didn't stop the rush of emotions that ran through his chest and down his entire body as he heard Merlin defend his honour, heard him call him a good man, heard him say that it was 'better to serve a good man than to rule with an evil one,' and it helped to numb the pain a little.

He looked down at his servant, blood staining his every feature and he despised himself.

Merlin wasn't a bad person, was he? Surely everything they had shared hadn't been a lie. Merlin couldn't- he wouldn't use 'magic' _against _Arthur, would he?

He was so confused, so many questions, so many emotions all forming into the undeniable feeling of vomit.

It hurt his throat as the tragedy of the last few minutes tried to escape his damaged body. He clenched at his stomach as it wretched and made no attempt to disguise the tortured sounds that left his mouth. "Stop this, please, I've seen enough." he practically begged the vacant presence.

And then without warning even more flashbacks of Merlin surrounded him, each and every one of the boy using magic. They were vivid and fast, fading just as quickly as they appeared. Merlin would utter words, his eyes would change colour, something brilliant but wrong would happen, and then the image would change, equally as confusing and harsh as the last.

It was terrifying and the Prince found himself cowering for it to end. There was, however, one thing about these images that was undeniably reassuring; every time Merlin had used magic it was to save Arthur, save Camelot, save lives, and it brought hope to the young Prince's heart.

His Merlin was a good man, despite harbouring such an evil truth.

Strangled tears escaped from the corners of his eyes as he closed them, tight, in an attempt to block it all out, stop it from happening, but it was no good.

The images danced in the backs of his eyelids, refused to go away, and Merlin's words echoed in his mind.

"I won't let you hurt him"

"He's a good man"

"Leave him be"

"I will stop you"

"I would die for him"

"I willingly give my life for Arthur's"

He opened his eyes. The honesty in Merlin's words ringing in his ears. The amount of times the boy had willingly risked his life for his friend had been outstandingly honourable, and it had always made Arthur feel incredibly flattered and important.

Now it seemed that there were even more times in which the boy had risked his life, and Arthur had never even realised.

He watched in despair as Merlin bargained his life away, making a deal with Nimueh in an attempt to save Arthur after he'd been bitten by the Questing Beast all those years ago.

Memories he'd filed away in a part of his brain labelled 'things to forget'.

And then these moments of bravery and stupidity transformed into courage and power.

Merlin changed from his innocent, docile self, into this masterful, strong being, using his magic to destroy all of the evil corrupted people that had ever sought out war upon the Kingdom.

The Warlock looked so wise and hypnotizing, and so unlike himself that the Prince had to step back, take a deep breath, and try to take it all in.

Merlin was not only a Warlock, but he was an incredibly powerful one and Arthur couldn't prevent his eyes from greedily rooming the active images.

He looked so courageous, so commanding, so- so breathtaking...

It truly was like looking at a completely different man.

His eyes glowing orangey within the dusty image, hand outstretched, his posture strong, tall, assertive and compelling. And then he'd utter words, foreign, unknown words that made horrible, brilliant, terrifying things happen around him.

He watched as Nimueh burned, exploded, dissolved into nothing in a storm of rage coming from inside the Warlock's heart. He heard the rain pour, thunder pound, and the cries of the sorceress as she met her end at Merlin's hand.

The room lit with thunder as the image faded into another and then another, all of Merlin defeating someone- something.

Fairies, Goblins, Trolls, Witches, anyone that had ever tried to attack Camelot, Merlin had defeated them.

But not for long did the Prince's awe last as his emotions twisted and turned into something far darker than apprehension or wonderment. He clenched his fists harder and bit his lip to stop the tears and conceal the anger and deceit that now lay deep in his stomach.

These images were no longer bright and empowering; they were dark, dangerous and uninviting, casting shadows on the Prince's features, dimming his threatening surroundings, and blackening his armour in dark truths and untold secrets.

They were continuous, deceitful and vast; all of Merlin lying or hiding something from the Prince, but the worst was yet to come as the next vision presented itself.

The serving boy freeing the Dragon... setting free the beast who murdered so many people, so many defenceless, innocent lives lost during those excruciating few days. His friends, his knights, his people tortured by the evil beast that had 'mysteriously' escaped all those years ago. But the mystery was no longer as Arthur witnessed the boy chant life changing words and attack the metal chains with his enchanted sword. He saw the beast flee from the caves in one vast movement and watched again as it sought out revenge upon Camelot.

He relived being in the battlefield, feeling the heat from the Dragons breathe burn at his back as he dived and fled from the ferocious beast before him, but what he saw next he was sure nothing could have prepared him for.

His lost lover, his best friend, his serving boy, _his _Merlin, was not only a Warlock, but now it seemed he was also a Dragon Lord, wise beyond words, compelling to watch, but painfully traumatic.

This was who Merlin was, who he had always been, and Arthur had not known. Years of lies, secrets and dishonesty...what had they actually shared?

Surely it hadn't been love, how could something so pure be formed around lies?

How could he love a man he did not know, and equally, how could Merlin have loved a man he could not be his true self around?

The Warlock was wise and masterful, powerful and strong, and he was- he was different.

He was incredibly dissimilar to the man Arthur had thought he had known, the man he had thought he had loved, who he thought had loved him back.

He was a Warlock.

A liar

A criminal

But most painfully, Merlin was a stranger and Arthur didn't think he could ever feel more betrayed.

Lost in his inner turmoil the Prince had missed the moment that the life destroying visions had ended and the room had once more been plunged into venomous darkness, only mentally entering the room again as he heard that demonic voice shattering his subconscious and peeling at his skin, leaving behind Goosebumps in its wake.

"Pendragon, you have now seen the truth. What happens next is up to you."


End file.
